Wildbrook Blog

“When you volunteer your time, skills, knowledge and enthusiasm to promote the quality of life in your community, or when you find ways to positively impact individuals, organizations and issues and contribute to the common good of a community — that is civic engagement, and when you are civically engaged, you are a LEADER! That is CIVIC LEADERSHIP!”

It really was an honor and privilege to share my story with such a fantastic group of women at the 2nd Annual Bering Sea Women’s Conference. This years theme was about bringing women together to share their stories, it was also dedicated to the memories of Karly McDonald and Kiara Renteria, two beautiful women whose lives were lost due to a car wreck on Ballyhoo this year.

I will forever be grateful for the opportunity and through the process I was reminded of why I ever got into civic leadership to begin with and after a couple year break of focusing on myself and really working on personal growth I am excited to say I have decided to run for council again. My prayer is that I can be a good leader and representative of my Alaska little community.

Here is the transcript from the speech I gave –

“First of all, my name is Candace Nielsen, formerly Schaack, and I am 28. I have 2 kiddos, Brooke Willow who is 6 years old and Wilder Jack 21 months old and another baby due in February. My husband is Matthew and his family are originally from Sand Point. We both grew up for the majority in Cold Bay which is where our story begun as a family and is a huge part of who we are today. We are avid outdoors people and love all things hiking, hunting and fishing. I also enjoy ugly days long storms that force us to cozy up inside around the tv or table for some good food.

I have to admit that when I first was approached about coming and speaking I just assumed I’d be sitting on a panel and answering some questions with other folks, when I discovered I was apart of a line up with Michelle and Laurel. I thought to myself “oooh noo” but after initial shock, I said well its too late to turn this ship back now, so I’m going to give you what I have and I truly hope it helps in some way. I haven’t achieved my degree yet and I don’t exactly have a career, unless you count raising little people, but I do have 28 years of experience living on the bering sea and I do love to share. I believe through sharing is where all the magic happens. I’m also a millennial, youre all more than welcome to follow me on social media where I mostly share pictures of my kids and dogs with paragraph long captions.

More about me – I am of Unangan decent, as well as many other ethnicities as I have discovered thanks to ancestry.com but I find my Alaska Native roots to be the biggest driver in my life decisions and way of living. Growing up I was influenced by a lot of stubborn, loving, and kind of crazy commercial fisherman and women who I blame for all of my bull headedness. Have any of you heard the saying – I’m not bossy, I have leadership skills? Yeah im pretty sure that was written by someone that had to endure me at some point. My husband also says his favorite part about me is my stubbornness. I attended boarding school at Mt. Edgecumbe High School and graduated in 2010 where I discovered the power of my voice and my role in politics was really ignited as I spent several years on the student council, multiple clubs, leading pep rally’s and actually had opportunities to travel and lobby our legislatures for certain projects. Mt. Edgecumbe also contributed to my passion for volunteer service through various leadership roles such as National Honor Society. Afterward graduating high school, I spent 2 years at UAA where I was also really involved, serving on student boards and became a member of Alpha Sigma Alpha sorority and was able to spend a lot of time volunteering throughout the city of Anchorage.

My father Paul is from Waterloo Iowa originally, he moved away as soon as he graduated high school. His first mission in his adult life was to go to the ocean, he joined the Navy spent 4 years abroad and then flew straight to Alaska after finishing his time. I get a lot of my sense of adventure and ability to push myself past my comfort zone thanks to him. My mother Dailey Schaack and her family are originally from Nelson Lagoon, which is where I spent my first 10 years of life. The main source of income for people in Nelson Lagoon comes from commercial salmon fishing during the summer months, some have a handful of odd jobs during the winter months. I will forever be grateful for being brought up throughout my childhood years alongside with my countless cousins in the tiny fishing village. My mom is the youngest of 12 children so there was plenty spoiling by all different aunties and uncles, there was also a lot of hands in how I was raised between instilling important life values and shaping my way of viewing the world. It’s hard to put into words the beauty of being raised by family members. Among the values the most important ones that were conveyed to me were how to love without conditions and give whenever possible. My dad started searching for other jobs and moved us from Nelson Lagoon when commercial salmon fishing was no longer a stable enough income to support our family.

Another part of my story has been figuring out how to be healthy and figure out how to navigate life with a good conscience. Growing up as most have in rural communities I had to endure a lot of loss of family members to drinking. It took me several years to overcome, process and heal from the loss. I also struggled with my own relationship with alcohol and my husband and I recently quit together January 1^st. Quitting alcohol was exceptionally hard for myself, but it led me on a journey of self-awareness, adopting healthy habits and changing a lot of my personal views. I bring that all up because it is a driving force in my passion to create healthy communities and bring forth healing for everyone.

Throughout the years my dad has kept his site in Nelson and continues to return in the summers to fish the peak of the salmon season. I talk a lot about Nelson Lagoon but Cold Bay also played a huge role in shaping me into who I am today as well. After we had Brooke, Matt quit his slope job and went to work for his grandpa as the Electric plant in Cold Bay and I became a stay at home mom and switched my degree to study Rural Development at UAF. Before switching I had been studying to be a teacher which after the school closed in Cold Bay it became clear to me I had to adjust my personal career goals.

During the time of the school closing I became really involved with fighting to keep it open. It was hard to watch the doors shut on the place I imagined my kids going to school the same way Matt and I did. It was also especially hard because I had just watched the Nelson Lagoon School close only the year before. It felt like parts of my childhood were being stripped away from me. It also tested me as a parent, I never wanted to fail my daughter and having to imagine living somewhere without a school really felt like I had just made one huge mistake. But it also forced me to really evaluate what were our real goals as parents, which Matt and I from day one never even had to really talk about because we already were on the same page of wanting to raise our kids in rural Alaska, living mostly outside off the land hunting and fishing. All of my time away at school whether Mt. Edgecumbe or college all I ever worked toward was getting back out to my communities and to serve as a role model for future generations and to help however I could. Stepping up and speaking out takes a ton of courage and strength but it’s crucial in ensuring sustainable futures for our communities.

So as a way to fight for the school I ran for city council. I was accepted with open arms, a rare case for most communities I have learned as it’s not exactly popular for younger people to join councils or boards. I didn’t ever feel out of place although amongst my fellow councilmen and women who had all been almost twice my age. I think partially they were ready for someone else to deal with some of the hub bub of small-town politics but also a lot of them watched me grow up and had always been extremely supportive. Cold Bay in general is an incredible supportive and wonderful community. We fought hard and brainstormed different ways to keep the school alive but in the end the district chose to shut it down as a cost saving measure. Again, this was a very depressing time watching people come from surrounding communities and gut our school building of everything that had served both Matt and I for some of our most influential years.  I firmly believe nothing hurts a community more than shutting a school down.

After my first year on council I was voted into the Vice Mayor position and a year after into the Mayor role. I spent a couple years as mayor, I was given incredible opportunities like being able to run for and get elected to the South West Alaska Municipal Conference board of directors where I learned a tremendous amount about our other areas in southwest and the similar issues facing our rural communities. I spent a lot of time advocating at meetings for other communities to grow their youth involvement whether it be internships at city or tribal offices or having honorary council positions for youth to serve on. The importance for getting kids in the door during their developmental years is huge if we would like to see them come back to their communities. I know I never fully understood exactly what all it took to keep a community running until being a part of the City Council. Between budgets, utilities, and advocacy for funding there are a lot of components and challenges in rural communities that you can really be oblivious to unless you attend a meeting. The same goes for the entire fisheries industry, I grew up commercial salmon fishing, but I never really put much thought into why it’s important to follow the politics, the management system via fish and game, the different fisheries that make up south west and environmental issues. When I joined the city council of Cold Bay no one had even attended a SWAMC Conference, Cold Bay has been convinced it was not a fishery community because it wasn’t home to a canary. I was astounded that anyone had ever come to that conclusion when Cold Bay serves as the hub of the region and actually a huge part of the fisheries because of it being the transportation link and medical center for almost all medivacs.

I believe serving on either tribal or city councils is something everyone should do at some point during their time in the community, as it is one of the ultimate acts of service to the community. I grew up traveling around the region with my dad as he served on the Aleutians East Borough and I watched my mom as she served on the local and district level school boards. They taught me the importance of being a voice for our little communities and to also listen for ways to help out other communities or to learn new ideas from one another. I felt like a lot of the community comradery had been lost and one of my biggest goals when I joined the City Council of Cold Bay was to get the community back on the map. 

Many rural communities are suffering from population decreases, expensive rates of living and over all negative outlooks but what makes them so unique and alluring remain. We just need people who are positive, willing to look outside the box and maybe slightly crazy. Speaking up can be extremely intimidating at times, especially if you’re fighting against a tide of daunting issues or people who have been sitting in the same positions for decades. But as long as you have heart and truly care about what it is your speaking up for people will stop and listen. Telling your personal story makes it that much easier to bring people aboard as well. Whether you grew up out here or you found your way down the chain it’s a guarantee you have a story to tell about facing challenges and becoming resilient to the factors.

I switched my gears 2 years ago from the city council to serve as our library director. It has been so enlightening and a great fit as I grow my family and continue to chip away at my degree. I have more freedom for serving my community and have enjoyed the break from the small-town politics. I spend a lot of time opening the library for people to come enjoy the newest books and movies as well as free Wifi. I also am usually hosting about one community event a month to give people the opportunity to come together in a healthy setting and enjoy company and a lot of times some kind of good food. We just had our annual Silver Salmon Derby last weekend with about 100 attendees, which is pretty dang good for a community of only about 45 people!

I have a great connection with my community members and it’s become my goal to not only give back to the community that gave so much to me but to also help better the community and create a sustainable future so that my kids can always have “home” to come back to after they’re grown up and following their paths in life. My parents worked hard to keep the communities going before me and continue to do so as my mom is the Mayor of Cold Bay and my dad spends his summers now in retirement coming back to Nelson Lagoon and working on upkeep on our boat and house so that we’re able to go back whenever we’d like.

The value of sharing one’s personal story helps others who may not share the same experiences to understand. I hope that me sharing my story helps you all understand how crucial it is to always stand up for what you believe in and make the connections with elected officials so they can also advocate for our communities.

Here is the transcript from the speech I gave –

First of all, my name is Candace Nielsen, formerly Schaack, and I am 28. I have 2 kiddos, Brooke Willow who is 6 years old and Wilder Jack 21 months old and another baby due in February. My husband is Matthew and his family are originally from Sand Point. We both grew up for the majority in Cold Bay which is where our story begun as a family and is a huge part of who we are today. We are avid outdoors people and love all things hiking, hunting and fishing. I also enjoy ugly days long storms that force us to cozy up inside around the tv or table for some good food.

I have to admit that when I first was approached about coming and speaking I just assumed I’d be sitting on a panel and answering some questions with other folks, when I discovered I was apart of a line up with Michelle and Laurel. I thought to myself “oooh noo” but after initial shock, I said well its too late to turn this ship back now, so I’m going to give you what I have and I truly hope it helps in some way. I haven’t achieved my degree yet and I don’t exactly have a career, unless you count raising little people, but I do have 28 years of experience living on the bering sea and I do love to share. I believe through sharing is where all the magic happens. I’m also a millennial, youre all more than welcome to follow me on social media where I mostly share pictures of my kids and dogs with paragraph long captions.

More about me – I am of Unangan decent, as well as many other ethnicities as I have discovered thanks to ancestry.com but I find my Alaska Native roots to be the biggest driver in my life decisions and way of living. Growing up I was influenced by a lot of stubborn, loving, and kind of crazy commercial fisherman and women who I blame for all of my bull headedness. Have any of you heard the saying – I’m not bossy, I have leadership skills? Yeah im pretty sure that was written by someone that had to endure me at some point. My husband also says his favorite part about me is my stubbornness. I attended boarding school at Mt. Edgecumbe High School and graduated in 2010 where I discovered the power of my voice and my role in politics was really ignited as I spent several years on the student council, multiple clubs, leading pep rally’s and actually had opportunities to travel and lobby our legislatures for certain projects. Mt. Edgecumbe also contributed to my passion for volunteer service through various leadership roles such as National Honor Society. Afterward graduating high school, I spent 2 years at UAA where I was also really involved, serving on student boards and became a member of Alpha Sigma Alpha sorority and was able to spend a lot of time volunteering throughout the city of Anchorage.

My father Paul is from Waterloo Iowa originally, he moved away as soon as he graduated high school. His first mission in his adult life was to go to the ocean, he joined the Navy spent 4 years abroad and then flew straight to Alaska after finishing his time. I get a lot of my sense of adventure and ability to push myself past my comfort zone thanks to him. My mother Dailey Schaack and her family are originally from Nelson Lagoon, which is where I spent my first 10 years of life. The main source of income for people in Nelson Lagoon comes from commercial salmon fishing during the summer months, some have a handful of odd jobs during the winter months. I will forever be grateful for being brought up throughout my childhood years alongside with my countless cousins in the tiny fishing village. My mom is the youngest of 12 children so there was plenty spoiling by all different aunties and uncles, there was also a lot of hands in how I was raised between instilling important life values and shaping my way of viewing the world. It’s hard to put into words the beauty of being raised by family members. Among the values the most important ones that were conveyed to me were how to love without conditions and give whenever possible. My dad started searching for other jobs and moved us from Nelson Lagoon when commercial salmon fishing was no longer a stable enough income to support our family.

Another part of my story has been figuring out how to be healthy and figure out how to navigate life with a good conscience. Growing up as most have in rural communities I had to endure a lot of loss of family members to drinking. It took me several years to overcome, process and heal from the loss. I also struggled with my own relationship with alcohol and my husband and I recently quit together January 1^st. Quitting alcohol was exceptionally hard for myself, but it led me on a journey of self-awareness, adopting healthy habits and changing a lot of my personal views. I bring that all up because it is a driving force in my passion to create healthy communities and bring forth healing for everyone.

Throughout the years my dad has kept his site in Nelson and continues to return in the summers to fish the peak of the salmon season. I talk a lot about Nelson Lagoon but Cold Bay also played a huge role in shaping me into who I am today as well. After we had Brooke, Matt quit his slope job and went to work for his grandpa as the Electric plant in Cold Bay and I became a stay at home mom and switched my degree to study Rural Development at UAF. Before switching I had been studying to be a teacher which after the school closed in Cold Bay it became clear to me I had to adjust my personal career goals.

During the time of the school closing I became really involved with fighting to keep it open. It was hard to watch the doors shut on the place I imagined my kids going to school the same way Matt and I did. It was also especially hard because I had just watched the Nelson Lagoon School close only the year before. It felt like parts of my childhood were being stripped away from me. It also tested me as a parent, I never wanted to fail my daughter and having to imagine living somewhere without a school really felt like I had just made one huge mistake. But it also forced me to really evaluate what were our real goals as parents, which Matt and I from day one never even had to really talk about because we already were on the same page of wanting to raise our kids in rural Alaska, living mostly outside off the land hunting and fishing. All of my time away at school whether Mt. Edgecumbe or college all I ever worked toward was getting back out to my communities and to serve as a role model for future generations and to help however I could. Stepping up and speaking out takes a ton of courage and strength but it’s crucial in ensuring sustainable futures for our communities.

So as a way to fight for the school I ran for city council. I was accepted with open arms, a rare case for most communities I have learned as it’s not exactly popular for younger people to join councils or boards. I didn’t ever feel out of place although amongst my fellow councilmen and women who had all been almost twice my age. I think partially they were ready for someone else to deal with some of the hub bub of small-town politics but also a lot of them watched me grow up and had always been extremely supportive. Cold Bay in general is an incredible supportive and wonderful community. We fought hard and brainstormed different ways to keep the school alive but in the end the district chose to shut it down as a cost saving measure. Again, this was a very depressing time watching people come from surrounding communities and gut our school building of everything that had served both Matt and I for some of our most influential years.  I firmly believe nothing hurts a community more than shutting a school down.

After my first year on council I was voted into the Vice Mayor position and a year after into the Mayor role. I spent a couple years as mayor, I was given incredible opportunities like being able to run for and get elected to the South West Alaska Municipal Conference board of directors where I learned a tremendous amount about our other areas in southwest and the similar issues facing our rural communities. I spent a lot of time advocating at meetings for other communities to grow their youth involvement whether it be internships at city or tribal offices or having honorary council positions for youth to serve on. The importance for getting kids in the door during their developmental years is huge if we would like to see them come back to their communities. I know I never fully understood exactly what all it took to keep a community running until being a part of the City Council. Between budgets, utilities, and advocacy for funding there are a lot of components and challenges in rural communities that you can really be oblivious to unless you attend a meeting. The same goes for the entire fisheries industry, I grew up commercial salmon fishing, but I never really put much thought into why it’s important to follow the politics, the management system via fish and game, the different fisheries that make up south west and environmental issues. When I joined the city council of Cold Bay no one had even attended a SWAMC Conference, Cold Bay has been convinced it was not a fishery community because it wasn’t home to a canary. I was astounded that anyone had ever come to that conclusion when Cold Bay serves as the hub of the region and actually a huge part of the fisheries because of it being the transportation link and medical center for almost all medivacs.

I believe serving on either tribal or city councils is something everyone should do at some point during their time in the community, as it is one of the ultimate acts of service to the community. I grew up traveling around the region with my dad as he served on the Aleutians East Borough and I watched my mom as she served on the local and district level school boards. They taught me the importance of being a voice for our little communities and to also listen for ways to help out other communities or to learn new ideas from one another. I felt like a lot of the community comradery had been lost and one of my biggest goals when I joined the City Council of Cold Bay was to get the community back on the map. 

Many rural communities are suffering from population decreases, expensive rates of living and over all negative outlooks but what makes them so unique and alluring remain. We just need people who are positive, willing to look outside the box and maybe slightly crazy. Speaking up can be extremely intimidating at times, especially if you’re fighting against a tide of daunting issues or people who have been sitting in the same positions for decades. But as long as you have heart and truly care about what it is your speaking up for people will stop and listen. Telling your personal story makes it that much easier to bring people aboard as well. Whether you grew up out here or you found your way down the chain it’s a guarantee you have a story to tell about facing challenges and becoming resilient to the factors.

I switched my gears 2 years ago from the city council to serve as our library director. It has been so enlightening and a great fit as I grow my family and continue to chip away at my degree. I have more freedom for serving my community and have enjoyed the break from the small-town politics. I spend a lot of time opening the library for people to come enjoy the newest books and movies as well as free Wifi. I also am usually hosting about one community event a month to give people the opportunity to come together in a healthy setting and enjoy company and a lot of times some kind of good food. We just had our annual Silver Salmon Derby last weekend with about 100 attendees, which is pretty dang good for a community of only about 45 people!

I have a great connection with my community members and it’s become my goal to not only give back to the community that gave so much to me but to also help better the community and create a sustainable future so that my kids can always have “home” to come back to after they’re grown up and following their paths in life. My parents worked hard to keep the communities going before me and continue to do so as my mom is the Mayor of Cold Bay and my dad spends his summers now in retirement coming back to Nelson Lagoon and working on upkeep on our boat and house so that we’re able to go back whenever we’d like.

The value of sharing one’s personal story helps others who may not share the same experiences to understand. I hope that me sharing my story helps you all understand how crucial it is to always stand up for what you believe in and make the connections with elected officials so they can also advocate for our communities.”

Alright, I did exactly what I told myself not to do… Imagine that. I spent way too much time from writing and after a much needed trip to an amazing place, to gather with a bunch of really incredible women, I am back on the wagon. A lot has happened since my last post. I’ve remained sober, especially since getting pregnant in July! I had prayed for another baby and hoped it would work out and God answered. Matt and I will be welcoming baby Nielsen number 3 in February. It is funny how no matter how calculated this pregnancy was, once I saw the for sure positive test I still felt the rush of anxiety, shock and slight worry for anything that could go wrong. I have a real knack for imaging all the possible terrible outcomes with any venture in my life. Anyways, despite all the worries and fear, being able to add another little person to our tribe is so exciting!

I’ve spent a lot of the summer feeling all the feelings that generally come with the first trimester, morning sickness, exhaustion and hormones. I’ve also felt a continue of gratitude for God and everything he has and continues to provide for my little family. Matt has officially started his new job at Fish and Wildlife and I couldn’t be any prouder of him for making such a drastic change in his life, for himself and for his family. It took a lot of courage to move from his family’s business and branch out on to his own. God had a plan and a path for him though and we are only grateful for all that has been given to us.

So I am excited to get back at this thing at share with you all our families adventures, the first of which being our trip to Dutch Harbor this weekend for the Bering Sea Women’s Conference where I was honored to be one of the keynote speakers. I will include all of the details in my next post! Thank you for joining back with me as I continue to document this sobriety journey and my slightly crazy life.

Love, Candace

I’m on day 16 of no alcohol, it’s funny how originally when I quit it wasn’t to be done forever it was to take a break. That’s what I HAD to tell myself to just finally do it. I will admit this was not my first attempt at taking a ‘break’ from booze (of course with the exception of when I was pregnant). By making it 16 days I have really taken a step back and have realized a lot of what has been holding me down. I feel like I also have gained a greater understanding of depression just through so many people reaching out to me. Having the support and people tell me “hey you know this might be something worth really looking into” and only wanting to best for me has meant so so much. I am coming to terms with my mental health (or lack thereof) and I’ve also started making more time for myself. I know a lot of moms out there can relate with me in the department of not taking time for ourselves. My vice had become alcohol, while for others it could be different things or ways of coping. I got to visit with a really fantastic therapist through a loved one and he made the most profound statement to me which explained that yes it takes a village to raise a child, but that village should not go away as we become adults. All I could do was cry because it is so true. As humans we are in constant need of validation and support, as adults, I feel that we forget to express that our friends or family. When you have your own family and things going on in life it is easy to put off reaching out to a friend or making those personal face to face connections a priority.

I didn’t ever think I was depressed, I have a so much to be thankful for and live for, but I got to the point where in my mind I was saying “what’s the point”. Admitting that I feel that way makes me feel guilty and I feel guilty because I know there are people in this world that are is situations that are awful and heartbreaking. But I feel like that is apart of what depression can do to you, you begin to disregard the fact that mentally you are not in a good place. No one has ever looked me in the eye and said, “Hey these are the signs of depression, if you begin to feel this way this is what is available for you.” We see all over social media people share phone numbers and help sites. I’ve shared them myself but I have been under the impression that those are for people in a crisis. I did not feel like I was ever at that point. I would not want to take someone’s time to talk about my miniscule issues such as feeling like I am a terrible house keeper or that I’m struggling with juggling school, my children and my home. But unfortunately I let those little things add up, I have fallen victim to myself and the negativity I have developed through what I am guessing is depression. I am still unsure of calling myself depressed because I have not received that diagnoses. I wish it was a conversation that we had throughout our lives so when we become adults we are fully aware of ourselves and our mental health. If you asked me what mental health actually meant or looked like I don’t think my explanation would come close to the technical definition. I believe that is because it looks different for all of us. I am awaiting responses from my blood draw that is checking for vitamin deficiencies and other possible issues that might be contributing to why I feel like an unstable, lazy bum. The provider did happen to ask if I have ever suffered from Seasonal Affect Disorder, to which I had to chuckle…. Ya probably, I do live in COLD BAY ALASKA.. But when I have felt like a mess 24/7 I’ve never took the time to check in with myself and correlate when I feel the cruddiest with the time of year.

I don’t know what the point of all this is but it feels good to let it out and I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read through my rambles. Do yourself a favor today, if you get a moment of quiet – sit down, close your eyes, relax your shoulders, take ten deep breaths and ask yourself how you feel at that moment? You might be surprised at what comes of it. I’ve been using the app Breathe and I try to practice a moment of meditation every day. I also have been reading more into my devotionals and take a moment to pray throughout the day. I am still struggling with irritableness and anxiety but it is helping me to bring peace into my heart. Again if you need to reach out, I am all ears, my only goal in my life is to help others. By helping myself I am getting closer to that goal. I feel honored and uplifted whenever anyone reaches out to me whether it is to say hi or to vent. I was raised in a village of people who communicate on a daily basis and I find myself longing for that again. I love you all.

Love, Candace